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[08 Nov 2006|12:31am] |
"Don't think for a moment that I'm really like any of the characters I play. That's why it's called acting."
Judgment. It's all a part of the everyday world. No matter how much you like to believe you're not that person, that you aren't the one to look at someone and think you have them figured out. No matter how much we all don't want to be the one that buys into the hype of all the tabloid talk, we're all guilty of doing just that. It's human nature, you can't help it. You don't know people and word of mouth is, as they say, the best advertisement. If you hear wonderful things about someone, you're going to naturally be drawn to want to know that person yourself. If you hear complete shit, your first instinct is going to be to stay away. Far, far away.
It's a tricky thing though, you have to be careful not to buy into all that hype yourself. You have to learn how to tune this town out. If you're not careful, you'll start believing what they say, and either extreme is damning to your soul. You can't let yourself believe your on that pedestal they put you on. Because, believe me you'll fall one day and once you do they will feed you to the wolves. Hollywood is such a fickle town, you're everyone one day, and the next, you're nothing. And if you buy into all the praise, when your time comes, that fall is twice as long and twice as hard. If you listen to the belittlements, you're only doubting yourself. And we have to remember, that these people don't know a damn thing about who we are. Yet, what so humorous about the whole situation is that we chose to be in this industry. We are all narcissistic one way or another.
I probably sound cynical. I'm not. I'm grateful for the life I have, I'm very fortunate. I know this. I grew up in a low income household and I’m the fucking poster boy, from rags to riches story for Hollywood. I appreciate what I have accomplished since my first role on television. Yet, when people assume your this big "Hollywood jerk", you can't help but double take yourself. See what I mean? We all do it, we all believe what they say about us. But when you are standing in line for at grocery store clutching your baseball cap down lower to cover your face as you hear a woman at the check out flipping through some tabloid with your picture on it wishing for you to disappear… Oh Christ, that’s when you need to take a few steps back and reevaluate yourself and your life and realize there is more to life than the brouhaha of Hollywood.
I'm a rambler if you haven’t noticed and also a bit of a rebel rouser. One of my fondest memories, but clearly not one of my agents was when I was three years old. I was escorted off set from a film because of “outlandish behavior.” I never been one to stay within the lines. To be cliché I move to the beat of my own drum and unlikely many of my peers I do not define myself as an actor. In fact, I try hard to not define myself.
You meet so many people who use their career as a backbone, but that's not who I am. I had to define myself in one word, it wouldn't be "actor." I once heard someone say that jobs aren't big enough for people, which is an odd saying but when you think about it, it makes sense. Jobs aren't big enough for people; they aren't big enough to sum an entire person up all by themselves.
One of the biggest things I value about my life is my independence without being detached from everyone I love. I think it's so incredibly important to have your own space and your own "you" time. Whether it's reading or lounging around lazily , I need an hour or so at least everyday where I can just be left to my own thoughts. And while my family and friends (including the “new rat pack”) have the power to keep me balanced, only I have the power to keep myself centered, and that is important to me.
I'm Leonardo Dicaprio, and I live. That's what I do, that’s what defines me.
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